Get Unstuck: Declare Your Ambiguity

Whether you are starting a new project on your own or working in collaboration with a team, those murky areas where you aren't clear what the facts are, what you want, what's even possible can stop you and the group in your tracks and the whole project can come to a lock-kneed halt. To get unstuck from this, use a tool I borrowed from Mary Beth O'Neill at LIOS (Leadership Institute of Seattle):

Declare Your Ambiguity

There are 5 steps to this process:

1. Declare The Ambiguity. Own up to it. Sometimes everyone is thinking the same thing, but no one wants to say so, wondering silently whether their peers have as many unanswered questions as they do, but not wanting to look incompetent. As long as this murky feeling sits with you and/or the group undeclared, you aren't really dealing with it, but it is still there.
2. State What you Are Clear On. In any given project or scenario, there are pieces you have clarity about, and pieces that are somewhat foggy or less clear, or a total blank. Begin with what you are clear about. Maybe it is the outcome, or the start date, or the timeframe. Whatever you are clear on, state it as a place to begin. This is like putting down the puzzle pieces you definitely recognize and you can build on them.
3. State what is unclear, undefined, or murky. "This is where I feel I'm grasping in the dark," or "Here is where the lines begin to fade for me," are statements describing that feeling of not knowing where you stand. It might be different for you than a colleague, but by stating it you open a dialogue that can be clarifying.
4. State the information that would clarify. "If I knew what the budget was, I'd feel better about providing some solutions," or "Who, exactly, is our perfect customer for this service?" or "How long will we be in this temporary office?"
5. Ask for what you need. Be specific: "Ray, can you let me know by tomorrow when the vendor is available and what he will charge for this part of the project?" 

Once these steps have been taken, more pieces of the puzzle come into focus and you can move forward. When working solo, you may want to have a thought partner to talk through your ambiguity with, such as a coach or friend. If you are one who journals, you might work it out on the page in a mind map format. Repeat as often as required. Keep moving toward the things that light you up.

Say No to Nebulous Obstacles!

For the last several weeks, I've been longing to pick up my paintbrushes and let my creative side out to play freely. Between the crunch of the holidays and launching a new game (more about that later), I'd been feeling like the mountain of things to do was crushing me to the point that I had no room to move, let alone paint anytime soon.

Then, on Saturday my husband and I went to exchange a couple of gifts at the mall and take our walk in relative warmth. I was drawn in to a new gallery and found myself standing before some paintings of whimsical trees which stirred such longing in my heart, I decided to act.

Yesterday, as I was planning my day and week, there was an insistent tap on my awareness to include time to paint, and I finally faced the beliefs that were keeping me from an activity that I love: they were a nebulous mix:

• a have a ton of important things to do (how many are in a ton, anyway?)
• this is frivolous because it is just for fun
• if I do this, there won't be time to do all the other stuff

When I asked myself how much time I needed to set aside for painting, and decided an hour would be a good start, I realized just how nebulous those reasons I'd been using actually were.

I also realized how many days I didn't indulge the desire to paint, and still all that other stuff did not get done, nor was my to-do list ever likely to be complete, since we continually add to it.

It took me 5 minutes to set up paints, painting surface and turn on the tunes. I painted blissfully for 50 minutes, completing 2 small paintings and a study in my sketchbook. The space was cleared and everything back in its place in the last five minutes of the hour I'd alloted.

Isn't it amazing how clear we are when we get specific about what is required to fulfill our desire? My takeaway? Be specific about what you really need to indulge your fun, your dreams, your passion. Then claim it and make the most of it. Say "no" to nebulous obstacles!